23 august 2007

been watching rescue me, things with liz are going really good right now.

25 august 2003

[watching cocktail in a small motel room in wollongong, australia]

when future civilizations look back and research our society they're going to think
tom cruise was worshiped as a god.
jesus was thirty- three when he was crucified and died for our sins.
tom cruise was only twenty- two when he made top gun.

22 july 2008

-existentialjizum -
(dialogue from the existential porno)


trixie mc sysphilus: fuck me bob, fuck me like i was your mother.

man: pool guy, came to clean your pool.
trixie: but i don't have a pool.
man: everyone you've ever known is going to die.

trixie: oh, oh, oh, i have never felt more alone then with you here and inside of me.

10 june 2008

drinking a sterling pinot noir 06'. it's a fruit forward wine with the character of california's central coast with opulent cherry flavors, toasty oak and a complex lingering finish.
also with a complex lingering finish and a toasty oak character... deez nuts.


it's like jay-z said, two choices in life either dead or in jail.


me: let's say your girlfriend fucked a horse, for whatever reason, how long would you think you would have to wait until you could have sex with her?

me: is there some sort of twenty-four hour rule or could she douche with some water and vinegar and take a really hot shower with bleach or like a combination of the two. everyone says that they would break up with her immediately, but i think that's bullshit. say you were in love and she was offered twenty five million dollars to fuck this horse.

jim: i would blow that horse myself for twenty five thousand dollars right here right now.

seen on a t-shirt with a chicago police star "serving and protecting whenever the fuck we feel like it"

facebook

brian is finished reading tomcat in love and is now feeling like a glazed donut whatever the hell that means.

i drink your milkshake! i drink it all up!